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PostPosted: 11/19/09 6:19 am • # 1 
[url=http://]http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=120570241&ft=1&f=1003[/url]

Postal Service Cancels Letter To Santa Program

by The Associated Press
November 19, 2009

Starry-eyed children writing letters to the jolly man at the North Pole this holiday season likely won't get a response from Santa Claus or his helpers.

Guess moms and dads better plan on answering the letters themselves!


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PostPosted: 11/19/09 12:00 pm • # 2 
Don't you get an answer on Christmas morning when you find out if Santa left what you asked for under the tree? I have to wonder what parents are dumb enough to send off the list anyway? (Obviously a lot of them.) Mine would of course offer to mail the letter for me...why would I have any reason to think they might have just kept it and read it for themselves to figure out what I wanted? Granted, it was a list of half the items in the toy section of the the Sears and Roebucks Christmas catalog, so probably not terribly helpful anyway...though they still seemed to manage to find some bizarre item every year that was not on the list and not wanted.


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PostPosted: 11/19/09 12:12 pm • # 3 
  • No one has ever seen flying reindeers, except Santa, Mrs. Claus and their elves, of course. However, since there are over 300,000 species of living organisms that are unclassified (though they are mostly insects and germs), we can give them benefit of doubt.
  • According to the Populations Reference Bureau, there are about 2 billion children (defined as under 15) in the world. Assuming that Santa caters to Christian children only and do not bother himself about children of other religion, he still has 15% of the above children population to think about.
  • 15% of 2 billion means 300 million children, which is certain an enormous workload, even for benevolent and kindly Santa.
  • Let's assume that there are about three children in each household and at least one of them is good. Thus, Santa has to visit 100 million homes during Christmas Eve.
  • Let's assume Santa starts distributing gifts, starting from 5 pm to midnight (which makes 7 hours). Since earth rotates and there is a difference of full 24 hours overall due to different time zones, we can say that Santa has 31 hours to finish his work. We can also assume that Santa works from East to West to use this time difference to his full advantage.
  • Visiting 100 million homes in 31 hours means that Santa has to visit 896 homes per second.
  • Thus, he has about 1/1000th of a second to do everything mentioned above such as parking his sleigh, looking for the right gifts, climbing down the sleigh and chimney, binge on snacks, fill the stockings, come up again and rush to his next stop.
  • Even if we assume that all households are distributed evenly throughout the earth for convenience of Santa and Santa Claus works non-stop for 31 hours (both of which are very big assumptions that are almost impossible!), Santa has to travel about 75.5 million miles in 31 hours and 650 miles per second.
  • Now the fastest man-made vehicle moves at 27.4 miles per second and normally reindeers can run at the speed of 15 miles per hour. 650 miles per second is 3000 times faster than the speed of sound.
  • On an average, each toy for a child weighs about 2 pounds; the sleigh has to carry over 321,000 tons plus the Santa with his big belly and his reindeers.
  • Known reindeers can only pull 300 pounds at once. If flying reindeers can pull up to 3000 pounds, about 214,000 reindeers will be needed to pull Santa's sleigh, which means sleigh must carry over 353,000 tons.
  • 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second in the air will create enormous friction and Santa, his reindeers and his sleigh will instantly burn to death, just like meteors that occasionally enter earth's atmosphere.
Thus, we can safely conclude that if Santa ever existed, he was dead when he attempted his seemingly impossible project for the first time and is no more alive.


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PostPosted: 11/19/09 1:57 pm • # 4 
Sid, you're a party pooper. Image


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PostPosted: 11/20/09 12:51 am • # 5 
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Joined: 05/23/09
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Location: ontario canada
Canada is still running it--HOH OHO is still operating. I googled it. My kids are writing letters to Santa next week as a writing process and letter writing assignment.


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PostPosted: 11/20/09 1:44 am • # 6 
glitterypickles539 wrote:
Sid, you're a party pooper. Image

Nothing is impossible - but I'm a realist.


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PostPosted: 11/20/09 3:39 am • # 7 
...though they still seemed to manage to find some bizarre item every year that was not on the list and not wanted.


LOL...so true, so true!!!


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PostPosted: 11/20/09 5:20 am • # 8 
IMO, the postal dept needs to scale back its number of employees, stop advertising, stop building new post offices and just go back to the basic of delivering mail. One of the things that I detest about the postal dept is when you go into a post office they only have 2-3 lines open and 5-6 more employees just standing in the back flapping their lips. This used to aggrivate me so much when I lived in Houston. One could not just go in and be out in 5-10 minutes.... nope... it took an house just to get a stamp because the machines were always out. Gerrrrrrrr


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PostPosted: 11/21/09 5:26 am • # 9 
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Dee, if they aren't authorized to work the front desk, they CAN'T go up there and help out, no mater how long the line is or how much they want to.

I worked in a Post Office many years ago. 4AM shift to unload the trucks. It was called a "casual" position. They hire you for 89 days, ( at 90 they had to pay benefits), then fire and re-hire you on paper to start another 89 days. Technically, the shift was 4AM to 10AM. But they'd send me home at 6 if there was nothing to do, with the warning that I HAD to be available for a call back until 10. Of course, you only got paid for the time you were in the building.

What would help is if the folks in line had their shit together & forms filled out before they get to the desk. lol And a basic ability to speak english would help too.


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PostPosted: 11/21/09 5:28 am • # 10 
Quote:
What would help is if the folks in line had their shit together & forms filled out before they get to the desk. lol And a basic ability to speak english would help too.


Don't go postal on us, Chaos. Image


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PostPosted: 11/21/09 5:35 am • # 11 
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Oh, I can totally understand why people get so frustrated working there. I've never seen such vicious office politics. LOL!



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PostPosted: 11/21/09 7:12 am • # 12 
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Quote:
Thus, he has about 1/1000th of a second to do everything mentioned above such as parking his sleigh, looking for the right gifts, climbing down the sleigh and chimney, binge on snacks, fill the stockings, come up again and rush to his next stop
Well that certainly explains why i never could catch up and see him

Good news he really does exist, hes just really really fast


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PostPosted: 11/21/09 11:10 am • # 13 
Chaos333 wrote:
What would help is if the folks in line had their shit together & forms filled out before they get to the desk. lol And a basic ability to speak english would help too.

It's always been very quick for me once I get to the counter at the post office, and yes, what slows the line down are the idiots who seem to have not been paying attention when taught things like how to write an address on an envelope in 2nd or 3rd grade. I watched someone ahead of me once with a package they were mailing. They screwed up something on the address, so the person at the counter pointed them to where to write the address and return address and had them step aside to do that while serving another customer. They came back, and had done the EXACT SAME THING, just on a new side of the box! I honestly don't know HOW that clerk kept her patience when that person managed to screw up all 6 sides of the box and still hadn't gotten an address on it right (IIRC, they kept switching the location of the address and return address). That's when you just want to tell them go use Fed Ex. Then again, I'd have probably been tempted to just accept the package at that point and let them understand their problem when it got delivered back to their own house. [img]/domainskins/bypass/img/smileys/tongue.gif[/img]

And, yes, even though all those forms are available all along the walls and tables you pass as you stand in line, people would wait until they got to the counter to start filling them out.


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PostPosted: 11/21/09 1:16 pm • # 14 
the post office has changed it's mind, and will allow volunteers to continue answering Santa mail... they feared privacy issues.. I can think of 40 or 50 more pressing "issues" they ought to think about resolving.. but Santa is safe...


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