Not the least bit funny but I had to post this somewhere.



Guess he figured that if he could finish in 30 seconds so could she?

Now I've got to clean up the coffee I just sprayed on my keyboard

“It’s gone completely off the rails!” complained viewers online. “Do you seriously expect us to believe that there’s a riot in the middle of a plague and the President is threatening to send the military to shoot people while simultaneously engaged in a name-calling fight with twitter? Jesus this makes Game Of Thrones’s last season look well written by comparison.”

America cancelled after disastrous final season



Popular reality TV series The United States of America has been pulled by broadcasters tonight after an outburst by lead star Donald Trump on social media. The news comes as no suprise to fans, many of whom have accused the show of jumping the shark in recent years, with the most recent season widely panned as being completely unbelievable.

“It’s gone completely off the rails!” complained viewers online. “Do you seriously expect us to believe that there’s a riot in the middle of a plague and the President is threatening to send the military to shoot people while simultaneously engaged in a name-calling fight with twitter? Jesus this makes Game Of Thrones’s last season look well written by comparison.”

The once popular series has suffered a series of setbacks in recent years, with writers struggling to compete with rival program The United Kingdom for viewership. “Ever since the Trump plot twist, the two shows have gone out of their way to out-drama each other,” explained TV expert Miles Tulong. “Britain won back viewers with the Scotland secession cliff-hanger, and that proved such a hit that they did the whole story over again with Europe only months later. But then they just went a bit too far. Boris Johnson the messy haired populist leader was clearly just cribbed straight from the United States’s plotline, and then when they went and gave him that near death with COVID, and the US had to go even further. Next thing you know it’s banning twitter, and drinking bleach. The whole things just ludicrous now, they’re killing off characters left right and centre and the central character doesn’t seem to have any redeeming traits whatsoever.”

Instead writers say they are planning a new spinoff series which will explore the backstory of the child of a billionaire and a musician, named X Æ A-12 and all the wacky adventures he gets up to by borrowing his father’s space ship. The show has already recieved a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and is expected to be the biggest TV hit since the Big Bang Theory.

SOURCE

Gems. It's hard to have fun these days. Everything that is humorous seems to grow out of a dark side.

Cyndi Lauper and Harvey Fierstein join the cast of Kinky Boots on Broadway for a bathroom break. You change the world when you change your mind.



https://www.advocate.com/comedy/2016/6/ ... s-just-pee

Devil Demands Refund On Trump Soul



“I’M IN way over my head,” a worried looking Satan said as he listened to the hold music played by the customer service department of The Trump Organization, hoping to secure a refund on a regrettable sell-your-soul-to-the-Devil transaction.

Normally delighted by carnage, devastation and suffering across humanity, the fallen angel is worried he’s bitten off more than he chew as the seeds of generations worth of division flourish in America.

“No, no, no,” Satan insisted as he finally got hold of a Trump employee, “I’m looking at the terms and conditions here, it clearly says ‘one soul in exchange for ego-massaging election victory which would momentarily make up for having such a small penis’. I held up my side bargain but c’mon, he’s gone a bit too far hasn’t he? And I mean, hey, I say this as the most evil entity known to humanity; this Trump guy’s a real fucking empathy vacuum”.

God’s nefarious nemesis went on to state that he also had a right to a refund on account of the poor grubby and worthless condition of the soul.

“It doesn’t even qualify as a ‘soul’, look at the state of this thing,” a frustrated Satan added, dangling a flimsy soul which had the same putrid stench as a skunk orgy.

Satan has previously only demanded refunds on souls of murderous dictators who risked bringing humanity towards an ‘end game’ which risked cutting short his long standing game of cat and mouse with God.

“I haven’t got much else going on in my life, so I’d miss it if it came to an end,” a sad Satan explained.

It hasn’t all been bad for the world’s now second most famous sin lover, as Satan has been able to feed off the transparent narcissism of some people, who were part of the problem, now pretending to care.

SOURCE

No empathy from me. Satan should have known what he bargained for.

Shades of South Park.

Sometimes good things just happen

Premakes - what would today's films look like if they'd been made in the 1950's?







And many more

[url]https://youtu.be/1g0fSLNDegY/url]




couldn't get it to embed.

Fixed - if you look at the "boxes" you'll see that the last one is labelled "video" - use that

I tried that too. Must have overlooked some setting. Thanks!

Just copy/past the Youtube url and then highlight it - click on the video button.

Otherwise, look at my post - click on "quote" and you'll see what it looks like - just type {video}ulr{/video} using square brackets.

FYI -
Did you guys know the FDA just approved a drug that reduces your chance of getting COVID-19 by 5X? It’s trade name is called Wearamaskasshole.

Side effects include mild inconvienience, possible victim complex, fear of people thinking you are a sheep, being ostracized by your anti-vax plandemic bros, and the power to stop your own asymptomatic transmission as this country stubbornly dives right on into that second wave.

Check with your doctor, or really anyone, to see if Wearamaskasshole is right for you. FDA and WHO both feel sure your DR will heartily agree.

At least the US is number one in one category ....