I have to agree that sometimes the PC crap goes over the top. This is one example. The author has some very valid points. I do not support Hobby Lobby, for reasons you know. But still...

Offended by cotton? Please don't take my biscuits and gravy

{Warning: If you are offended by cotton and protest by refusing to wear cotton or trade using our cotton currency, you will be offended by this column.)

Most of you have heard by now about the woman who posted on social media that she was offended by stalks of cotton plants used as decor in a Texas Hobby Lobby. She wrote: "There is nothing decorative about raw cotton... A commodity which was gained at the expense of African-American slaves."

OK, lady. You have a right to complain on your Facebook page about whatever butters your biscuit. After all, that's why God invented social media. Well, that and sharing baby photos and Bible verses. Especially the Bible verses.

If you're offended, you're offended. But then I have the right to be offended that you were offended. If I wanted to, which I don't, because one more offended person on this planet is likely to tip the balance in favor of the apocalypse that's allegedly, reportedly, supposedly going to occur Saturday and that would really mess with my plans to watch college football.

So ... let's all stop being offended. I know it would be difficult. We'd need a drug, like Chantix, to help stop those terrible cravings we have to get our feelings hurt over every real or hallucinated slight. But we could try it for a day, kinda like in "The Purge," only without all the killing. We could all do yoga and take lots of deep breaths or something. Or, crazy idea, we could just act normal. You know, instead of acting as if the world owes us an offense-free environment where everyone eats tofu and drives smart cars.

But I'll admit the woman's post did get me thinking about the antebellum south. There are some symbols of that time we can all be glad are gone: hoop skirts, for one. It would be hard to get through a door with one of those things and I hate to even think about how those women got through all that fabric to (whisper) do their business. And corsets. I'm not okay with corsets, even the Frederick's of Hollywood kind. But, then, that may be because I no longer have a waist and I like to breathe.

Any-hoo, my point is, I get that there's no need for Confederate flag bikinis in the modern era. I understand some things deserve to be taken with offense. But we can't get rid of everything representative of plantation life. Think what the world would be like without cotton (which, by the way, has been harvested for the past 150 years by paid laborers who are every color in the LGBT rainbow):

Our underpanties would be stiffer, for sure.

We might have to use leather to make currency - which, didjaknow, is actually made of cotton fabric? Wait, didn't slaves also help raise the cows and make leather? So maybe we'd have greenbacks made of green polyester, or - for use when paying for upscale items - a nice organza.

And lawd help, what would we use to clean our ears? "Spandex swabs" just don't have the same ring.

And then there's the fact that tons of other crops were once cultivated by slave labor, including corn, rice, sugar, peanuts ... and lots of slave craftsmen made items still around today, from plantation homes to bridges to intricate ironwork.

There has to be a line. Doesn't there? And I'm thinking getting offended by two important ingredients in Reeses Cups endangers all humankind.

Next, someone will be targeting my beloved biscuits, which (history lesson alert!) were once made by slaves in the antebellum south. Just think of a world in which our fluffy buttery biscuits are replaced by those crunchy little cookies Brits serve with tea. The thought makes me shudder, y'all. Can I still say "y'all?" I'll have to think about that one, but first I need to go fix me some grits while I still can.

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